How to Maintain a Good Relationship with your Teenager with ADHD

We all know that the teenage years are difficult. That being said, when a teenager has ADHD, these years are so much more complex and complicated for him as compared to his peers who do not have ADHD. Let us remember that individuals with ADHD are arguably more immature than are their peers without ADHD. They are facing the onset of puberty; peer pressure; increased social pressure; more difficult school work as well as an exponential increase in the amount of the work that they are required to do; etc.


This is also a stressful time for parents as well, because no matter how good a relationship a parent has had with their child, all of a sudden when he becomes a teenager, he may behave in a fractious manner to his parent. Quite suddenly, a comment that the parent made yesterday to their child is misperceived today along with an angry retort.

What can parents do to decrease the number of possible arguments that might ensue? First of all, keep your teenager’s schedule very rigid and hopefully, the same as it has always been. In that way, everything will be predictable for him, which will certainly enable him to feel more relaxed.

Second of all, instead of allowing your child to remain insular about what is bothering him, use emotional intelligence. Ask him, for example, “You seem upset. What is bothering you?” Or “Would you like to talk about what is upsetting you?” Or, “Would you like to talk about what is disturbing you now or later?”

Third of all, do not let your teenager see that he has upset you, or that you are giving him negative attention as a result of his inappropriate behavior or inappropriate behavior. If he senses that you are giving him negative attention, his behavior and/or verbiage will be difficult to diminish.

More later….